A day with mom

My mother has been in a nursing home for a couple of years. She has an advanced case of Macular Degeneration, hard of hearing, and many psychiatric problems. She wound up in the nursing home because of frequent falls, inability to fix food for herself, mismanaging her meds, poor hygiene, and very poor decision-making.

She had been residing in an independent living apartment. It was a cute apartment that even I would live in. They had a schedule of activities that were geared for active older adults. The best thing was they provided 2 meals a day except weekends. Breakfast and lunch were served in a gracious dinning room. The chink in the chain was when mother got on the phone and had some nurse practitioner come to her apartment that was going to write her scraps for such things as Xanax and Ativan.

I had spent 6 months tapering her off the Xanax, yes it is addicting, along with several medications that she did not need. The only thing I could not remedy was the psych issues and her obsession.

Two years ago Christmas mother fell. One time while out with a very irresponsible aunt who never even reported to the nursing home she had fallen. She fell again while wearing a pair of shoes she was unfamiliar with and did not fit her feet. She was allowed to walk in her with these on and she fell breaking her hand.

Any such trauma to someone of advanced age will set him or her back. No matter how trivial a small adventure places them in a spin. Of course this resulted in a wound to the top of her hand and required wound care as well as a splint to her right hand.

Because of this injury she slowly just stopped getting out of bed or doing anything for herself. If you don't use it you loose it. She can no longer walk, sit up, has difficulty feeding herself and doing simple things for herself.

Well yesterday on my visit 2 young ladies had managed to talk her into getting up. It was also a day when I just happened to show up. I got to spend 2 hrs with my mom while she was up and out of the bed. I fed her lunch, combed her hair, and helped her brush her teeth. She spoke about stuff, other than her obsessions, and it was an enjoyable day. There haven't been too many of those for a while.